Monday, July 29, 2013

Being Happy

My best friend has once told me that I'm easily pleased - I get happy and satisfied with little things. 
Neither did I nor her realize that as much as we hate to admit but very often, it's the simplest things in life that puts a smile on our faces.
And then I have friends who were absolutely amazed by the way I handled stressful times and even went on to tell me that should any of what had happened to me, happens to them, they'll either consider suicide or fall into deep depression. Only my closest friends know exactly what I'm talking about.
Now, I don't mean to be proud or braggy but I do admit I take things easily (sometimes a little too easily) and this could either be good or bad. 

Here's a good article about BEING HAPPY - with a few input from yours truly.
Enjoy and do feel free to comment.

1. Don’t hold grudges.
Quite impossible if you ask me. But I usually just shrug it off. People make mistakes and I'm equally guilty of it too. And for those who REALLY pisses you off, think of them as: beyond stupid or of different wave lengths. And you'll automatically forgive them.

2. Treat everyone with kindness.
The rule of the bible: Do to others what you want them to do to you. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Enough said.

3. See problems as challenges.
What's the worse scenario that can come out of the problem? You lose a job? Find a new one. Lost a loved one? Cry. Take a year or two to cry. And then move on as they would have wanted you to. Realize that millionaires did not come from a bed of roses. Most of them struggled REALLY hard to get to where they are today. If success is that easy, everybody would be successful today.

4. Express gratitude for what they already have.
There’s a popular saying that goes something like this: “The happiest people don’t have the best of everything; they just make the best of everything they have.” You will have a deeper sense of contentment if you count your blessings instead of yearning for what you don’t have.

5. Dream big.
yes, dream big. And then execute your dream. While doing this, put on a pair of ear plugs to drown out the laughter of others. The reason these people are laughing at you is because they have time on their hands to do so - which, well, means they are clearly not doing much of their own.

6. Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Happy people ask themselves, “Will this problem matter a year from now?” They understand that life’s too short to get worked up over trivial situations. Letting things roll off your back will definitely put you at ease to enjoy the more important things in life. See the bigger picture and always ask yourself: "What can be the worse outcome from this situation? and is life just all about this? If you were to die tomorrow, will this still be the biggest problem now?"

7. Speak well of others.
You never know when what you've said about others will reach their ears. Saying nice things about other people encourages you to think positive, non-judgmental thoughts.

8. Never make excuses.
Push yourself to be the best. You know you are on the right track when you constantly compare yourself - with yourself months ago. Be honest with yourself and never make an excuse for yourself.

9. Get absorbed into the present.
Happy people don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. They savor the present. They let themselves get immersed in whatever they’re doing at the moment. Stop and smell the roses. Just last month when Malaysia was covered in haze, I just thought to myself "how nice it is to be able to go out and breathe in fresh air again." We very often take for granted the most beautiful things God has offered us - for free - the smell of flowers, fresh air, the rising of the sun in the morning and the sunset. Oh and the stars and moon twinkling and lighting up the dark skies at night. Live in the present. 

10. Wake up at the same time every morning.
Have you noticed that a lot of successful people tend to be early risers? Waking up at the same time every morning stabilizes your circadian rhythm, increases productivity, and puts you in a calm and centered state. And helps you think rationally too - seriously.

11. Avoid social comparison.
Everyone works at his own pace, so why compare yourself to others? If you think you’re better than someone else, you gain an unhealthy sense of superiority. If you think someone else is better than you, you end up feeling bad about yourself. You’ll be happier if you focus on your own progress and praise others on theirs. The best and only person you should compare yourself to - is, yourself. 
As a kid I was told that there's no such thing as a stupid person - the beggar on the road have seen and know some things you don't and will probably never know.  

12. Choose friends wisely.
I am still working hard on this. I usually hang around friends and companions who have the exact opposite nature and characteristics from myself. I guess they say, opposites attract?
Misery loves company. That’s why it’s important to surround yourself with optimistic people who will encourage you to achieve your goals. The more positive energy you have around you, the better you will feel about yourself.

13. Never seek approval from others.
It's great to get opinions and feedback from a third party every now and then, to help you see a bigger picture of whatever your are facing/going through but never allow someone to dictate your actions or decisions. If you have to always seek approval or rely on others to heavily influence your decisions or actions, you are a backbone-less person with no character of your own.
Happy people don’t care what others think of them. They follow their own hearts without letting naysayers discourage them. They understand that it’s impossible to please everyone. Listen to what people have to say, but never seek anyone’s approval but your own.

14. Take the time to listen.
Talk less; listen more. Listening keeps your mind open to others’ wisdoms and outlooks on the world. The more intensely you listen, the quieter your mind gets, and the more content you feel. And, my dear friends, by listening (which is what I ALWAYS LOVE TO DO), I am able to gage the way a person is, or his/her intentions just by the delivery of speech. Language is one of the only ways a human can express his/herself - how else better to determine the characteristics and true nature of a person if not by his/her speech?

15. Nurture social relationships.
A lonely person is a miserable person. Happy people understand how important it is to have strong, healthy relationships. Always take the time to see and talk to your family, friends, or significant other. Be surrounded by friends and people who lift you up and make you feel good - especially in your darnest moments.

16. Meditate.
Someone suggested that I join yoga and meditation. I just may. Meditating silences your mind and helps you find inner peace. You don’t have to be a zen master to pull it off. Happy people know how to silence their minds anywhere and anytime they need to calm their nerves.

17. Eat well.
Guilty as charged. 
Junk food makes you sluggish, and it’s difficult to be happy when you’re in that kind of state. Everything you eat directly affects your body’s ability to produce hormones, which will dictate your moods, energy, and mental focus. Be sure to eat foods that will keep your mind and body in good shape.

18. Exercise.
Even more guilty.
Studies have shown that exercise raises happiness levels just as much as Zoloft does. Exercising also boosts your self-esteem and gives you a higher sense of self-accomplishment.

19. Live minimally.
Happy people rarely keep clutter around the house because they know that extra belongings weigh them down and make them feel overwhelmed and stressed out. Some studies have concluded that Europeans are a lot happier than Americans are, which is interesting because they live in smaller homes, drive simpler cars, and own fewer items.

20. Tell the truth.

Honesty is really the best policy. It's good to be upfront and honest about things no matter how bad they'll make you look. Nobody likes liars let alone trust them. So, rub off that mask you call a face and quit having to "say or do things which you think will conform to society". Whatever that is.
Lying stresses you out, corrodes your self-esteem, and makes you unlikeable. The truth will set you free. Being honest improves your mental health and builds others’ trust in you. Always be truthful, and never apologize for it.

21. Establish personal control.
Can anyone say a big GUIL to the TY?
Happy people have the ability to choose their own destinies. They don’t let others tell them how they should live their lives. Being in complete control of one’s own life brings positive feelings and a great sense of self-worth.

22. Accept what cannot be changed.
Life is not fair. There are many, many things that are beyond our control and even if we were to turn back time to fix it, realize that there are many other things that could have happened either way and there's absolutely nothing anybody can do about it. No matter what the scenario is. Once you've accepted that, you'll not be afraid of anything that'll come your way. 
Once you accept the fact that life is not fair, you’ll be more at peace with yourself. Instead of obsessing over how unfair life is, just focus on what you can control and change it for the better.

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